Making your relationship work out is a tough job. The truth is, whether it's a relationship with a boy or a girl or any of the other genders, every relationship has problems. Sadly, nothing is as perfect as a relationship with your kolbalish.
Perhaps you love your significant other dearly, but things are going wrong and you just can't understand why. If you don't fix it soon enough, you'll end up losing them and then you'll be left thinking, “Where did it all go wrong?” With all that being said, I am writing this down to help you and by the end of this article, hopefully, you will know why your relationship isn't working out. It should be noted that once again, I cannot include all my wisdom in such a short frame of words, so I'll give you the best of my advice.
This is by far one of the most important reasons that your relationship with your lover might not be working out. It's alright to be confused right now, but see, it's called a “relationship” for a reason. The word signifies that you're on a ship called “Relation” where you must maintain various connections with multiple people. Why keep one lover when you can keep five more? Always remind yourself of the true meaning of a relationship. Never stay loyal.
Giving or taking affection. See, if you're giving them affection, it means that you're appreciating them and making them feel loved, which, in this era, is completely wrong. Love is dead, guys. Instead, bottle up all your emotions and send them the signal that you don't actually care about anything other than some dishting dishting.
Regarding the subject of taking their affection, once again - terrible idea. Doing so means allowing them to get close and grow attached to you, which, frankly, is very annoying and not good at all for your relationship. However, if the affection comes in a tangible form such as chocolates, cakes, expensive gifts, etc. then DEFINITELY take it.
This is where most, if not ALL relationships, go horribly wrong. You two keep contact too much which makes it much more difficult to live up to its true meaning. Communication is bad for your mental health. Very few people can handle the idea of replying back in the next 30 or 60 seconds instead of replying back a week later. How can you do all your important work like lying down and scrolling through your newsfeed and liking pictures of cute guys/girls/both if you have to constantly reply back to the one person who genuinely loves you? If you truly want a good relationship, there must be very little communication. Live as the true egomaniac you were born to be.
Mistakes are inevitable, and that's okay (unless it's with your kolbalish, of course). That rift of misunderstanding that will always be there. But the point at which most people fail is how they tackle this mistake. Society teaches us to own up for these mistakes, but note that that teaching is worth nothing in a good relationship. Be the egomaniac you should be and blatantly blame them for the things that are your fault. ESPECIALLY the things that are your fault; good relationships have good plot-twists.
Now, this is the most important one because at the end of the day, the two of you are different people. Two halves of one whole, but the halves are not one and the same. In fact, you are not two halves of one whole, but two different wholes that make a bigger whole, a more complete whole. But the two wholes are flawed, imperfect. The longer you stay with the other person, the more you will come to realise this fact. And you can do two things about it: either help them fix it, and if it can't be fixed, help them bear it.
However, that's “advice” that one of those boring and misinformed articles online would give you. Since you're reading my much more superior article, what do I have to say about this? Do not accept them for who they are, label them a freak and call off the relationship to be with your other four lovers.
But, on a serious note: please, do the opposite of everything I stated. If you're in a relationship, please analyse it yourself as much as you can and ask yourself if you're treating them right, if you're being unnecessarily mean to them, whether you're being loving enough, things like that. Most importantly, it's a relationship; talk things out with them and figure out the problems you two have with each other.
Initially, I intended to leave this as just a comedy article, but I've seen too many people messing up the simplest of things, and hence decided to include this part. If this last paragraph helps anyone even a little, I'll be satisfied. Be loyal to them. Love and communicate with them. Swallow that galaxy-sized ego and understand when it's your fault. Accept them for who they are. Aren't I a mushy one, eh?
Rasheed Khan is a hug monster making good music but terrible puns and jokes where he's probably the only one laughing. Ask him how to pronounce his name at email@example.com